Wednesday, April 15, 2015

What You See Is What You Get

Ladies, Ladies! if you are engaged, living together, seriously dating -- whatever! please take a hard look at that man you are planning on spending the rest of your life with. that man, in all his imperfect glory, is all that you can ever hope for. no amount of love or dedication or patience or nagging or time is going to change him, his attitudes, his habits, or his friends. do you hear what i'm telling you?

let me tell you a little story. when Russ and i first started dating, i bowled every week in a gay bowling league. of course, i invited him to come bowl with us. well, he did and there was an open spot for him to bowl with us; but, of course, he did not have a pair of socks with him. so i suggested he take my credit card (wtf?? i know right?) and go across the parking lot to buy some socks.



what i meant was go across the parking lot to the K-Mart and buy a cheap pack of socks for bowling. is that what the bitch did? oh no. he came back with two pair of Polo socks from Parisian's.

hello? this instant was a microcosm of our entire life together. everything i needed to know about our financial life together was encapsulated in that one moment.

Russ and i have now been together for almost 15 years. today he wrote a $20 bad check to the grocery store. let me clarify - he wrote a $20 bad check on an account that is currently $200 overdrawn to buy cigarettes and wine. yet, i have absolutely no right to bitch.

the man i fell in love with, so many years ago, is still the same. he is wonderful, caring, loving, affectionate, and spoils me like no other man ever would. he would also pawn a $250 gold ring to buy a $20 bottle of gin.

so? almost two decades wiser, what's my advice? simply this: love and cherish that man with all your heart. embrace his weaknesses and appreciate his strengths. he has both.

realize that NO relationship (absolutely NO relationship) is perfect. now ask yourself; honestly, would you be better without him? if not then pray, Pray, PRAY that he does the same for you.

smooches all! here's hoping that the worst that ever happens only serves to open your eyes to all the blessings you take for granted every day.

SJ


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